sleepless in Austin
Well, it's past midnight and although I realize it isn't *that* late, I can tell already there's no way I'm going to be able to fall asleep easily. Even though I'm physically tired, my brain is not doing a good job at shutting off. Normally I can will myself to drift off. I am after all a huge fan of napping/sleeping/dozing/lying comatose. This hobby I place second only to eating. Speaking of which I'm hungry again.
Currently my mind is thinking of the "Evil Pink Sugar Cookies." The local grocery store, HEB, carries these things in 10 pack clam shell containers and they precisely look like this spinkles and all:
There's something about the mouth feel that makes these things delectable. They're super soft and in reality, have absolutely not substance. In fact, you get maybe a 2 second high off of these things because there's not any chewing involved. And yet, the delicate flavor (they're actually not too sweet) and inviting aroma of butter makes you want to eat another one...and another...and thus a new form of crack is born.
I offered one to my mom today who tagged along with us for grocery shopping. To my horror, she wiped off the icing before eating the cookie:
"The color scare me," she said.
Indeed, there are very few edible things in nature that come in that shade of pink. I asked her if she liked it.
"Like what?"
The cookie.
"Oh, I forgot I ate it. I bet it's fattening."
See? Not even my mother, who I inhereted my gluttony from, could even remember she tasted such a thing.
T thinks they're vile and in a lot of ways they are because aside from flour, sugar and egg, I can't quite figure out what other ingredients are. Caranuba wax. Why would you need that? They're also 90 calories each. Still, they taste darn good to me.
***
My brain is also abuzz because there's been so much going on lately. As you know, my mom moved up here into our home and then a couple of days later found an apartment in the neighborhood, so it seems like all we've been doing lately is moving boxes, packing and unpacking.
My brother came down Saturday morning to help mom move (again) and I only got to spend about 10 hours with him. My friend Mark had already planned to introduce me to his friend Dave who works over at Guitar Resurrection (a fantastic locally owned shop specializing in vintage guitars and amps) because he was looking for a theremin player for his band. That conversation went fairly well above all the ripping and roaring from the sound room next door as Mark was hammering out power chords over the Bogner Amp (3 grand...sheesh, amps are expensive) he's been eyeing for some time. I ended up buying a guitar slide for my brother, oohing and ahhing the various accessories in the store, musing over various guitar picks all shades of the rainbow and then settled on some heavier gauge ones simply because I liked the color. I'm really not a guitarist, but I do appreciate the accouterments. Mark kept mentioning he always feels like a kid in a candy store whenever he visits and I don't blame him...
I have mentioned this before, but I'll say it again. If you're a single woman and you really want to find a guy, just walk into a guitar store. It would help if you knew music, especially if you can play guitar (because your hotness factor will shoot through the roof) and bonus points if you can keep up in conversation about types and feature of guitars, but just knowing an instrument helps. If you don't you can always be the one asking for lessons---believe me, they staff will want to teach you. I have yet to meet a chick who actually worked at a guitar shop. For whatever reason, even though I know there are a lot of gals who play guitar, you'll find mostly men, roughly in their early to mid 20's in various manners of dress (yet all slightly dishelved even if the outfit consists of a suit) hanging out on a Saturday afternoon there. It's like Fry's electronic store but with less geeks or Home Depot with less dads.
Anyway, after the music store excursion, Mom, T, JBRo and I watched Beth perform works by Hayden and Beethoven with the Austin Choral Consort at St. Matthew's Episcopal church. Mark was there too since his vocal coach is Barry Scott Williams, the choral conductor. That was a lovely affair and would have been a nice way to end the night except that mom really wanted a television and the only place open that late was Walmart.
I hate Walmart. Not even just the corporate aspect of it, but the layout, the chaos, the shitty products and the people! This is where my classism and judgemental side rears its ugly head. Arrrgh! People, just because it's Walmart doesn't mean you suddenly need to look the part of trailer trash. A tube top should never be worn on anyone over 150 lbs. If we can see your ass crack when you're not even bending over, the skirt is too darn short. Wear deodorant....I mean, I don't see these types of people on a day to day basis in the city. I only see them in Walmarts. Makes no sense. Do they live there?
Not only were we at Walmart, it happened to be during tax free weekend, so the lines were enormous. Here we were at 11:00pm fighting to grab the HD flat screen TV for mom amongst wailing kids, screaming parents and a whole mess of weirdos who were there just because they had nothing better to do. We just sat next to a timpani and 200 piece choir for the past 2 hours and the night before T and I were at a rock concert, so the sounds of whiny kids really got on our nerves.
Nevertheless, we got mom a TV.
***
It's about 1 am now and I'm starting to crave hot sauce and chips. I'm thinking if I stay up longer I'm eventually going to want a steak dinner. Better go to bed now. Long work day ahead....
Currently my mind is thinking of the "Evil Pink Sugar Cookies." The local grocery store, HEB, carries these things in 10 pack clam shell containers and they precisely look like this spinkles and all:
There's something about the mouth feel that makes these things delectable. They're super soft and in reality, have absolutely not substance. In fact, you get maybe a 2 second high off of these things because there's not any chewing involved. And yet, the delicate flavor (they're actually not too sweet) and inviting aroma of butter makes you want to eat another one...and another...and thus a new form of crack is born.
I offered one to my mom today who tagged along with us for grocery shopping. To my horror, she wiped off the icing before eating the cookie:
"The color scare me," she said.
Indeed, there are very few edible things in nature that come in that shade of pink. I asked her if she liked it.
"Like what?"
The cookie.
"Oh, I forgot I ate it. I bet it's fattening."
See? Not even my mother, who I inhereted my gluttony from, could even remember she tasted such a thing.
T thinks they're vile and in a lot of ways they are because aside from flour, sugar and egg, I can't quite figure out what other ingredients are. Caranuba wax. Why would you need that? They're also 90 calories each. Still, they taste darn good to me.
***
My brain is also abuzz because there's been so much going on lately. As you know, my mom moved up here into our home and then a couple of days later found an apartment in the neighborhood, so it seems like all we've been doing lately is moving boxes, packing and unpacking.
My brother came down Saturday morning to help mom move (again) and I only got to spend about 10 hours with him. My friend Mark had already planned to introduce me to his friend Dave who works over at Guitar Resurrection (a fantastic locally owned shop specializing in vintage guitars and amps) because he was looking for a theremin player for his band. That conversation went fairly well above all the ripping and roaring from the sound room next door as Mark was hammering out power chords over the Bogner Amp (3 grand...sheesh, amps are expensive) he's been eyeing for some time. I ended up buying a guitar slide for my brother, oohing and ahhing the various accessories in the store, musing over various guitar picks all shades of the rainbow and then settled on some heavier gauge ones simply because I liked the color. I'm really not a guitarist, but I do appreciate the accouterments. Mark kept mentioning he always feels like a kid in a candy store whenever he visits and I don't blame him...
I have mentioned this before, but I'll say it again. If you're a single woman and you really want to find a guy, just walk into a guitar store. It would help if you knew music, especially if you can play guitar (because your hotness factor will shoot through the roof) and bonus points if you can keep up in conversation about types and feature of guitars, but just knowing an instrument helps. If you don't you can always be the one asking for lessons---believe me, they staff will want to teach you. I have yet to meet a chick who actually worked at a guitar shop. For whatever reason, even though I know there are a lot of gals who play guitar, you'll find mostly men, roughly in their early to mid 20's in various manners of dress (yet all slightly dishelved even if the outfit consists of a suit) hanging out on a Saturday afternoon there. It's like Fry's electronic store but with less geeks or Home Depot with less dads.
Anyway, after the music store excursion, Mom, T, JBRo and I watched Beth perform works by Hayden and Beethoven with the Austin Choral Consort at St. Matthew's Episcopal church. Mark was there too since his vocal coach is Barry Scott Williams, the choral conductor. That was a lovely affair and would have been a nice way to end the night except that mom really wanted a television and the only place open that late was Walmart.
I hate Walmart. Not even just the corporate aspect of it, but the layout, the chaos, the shitty products and the people! This is where my classism and judgemental side rears its ugly head. Arrrgh! People, just because it's Walmart doesn't mean you suddenly need to look the part of trailer trash. A tube top should never be worn on anyone over 150 lbs. If we can see your ass crack when you're not even bending over, the skirt is too darn short. Wear deodorant....I mean, I don't see these types of people on a day to day basis in the city. I only see them in Walmarts. Makes no sense. Do they live there?
Not only were we at Walmart, it happened to be during tax free weekend, so the lines were enormous. Here we were at 11:00pm fighting to grab the HD flat screen TV for mom amongst wailing kids, screaming parents and a whole mess of weirdos who were there just because they had nothing better to do. We just sat next to a timpani and 200 piece choir for the past 2 hours and the night before T and I were at a rock concert, so the sounds of whiny kids really got on our nerves.
Nevertheless, we got mom a TV.
***
It's about 1 am now and I'm starting to crave hot sauce and chips. I'm thinking if I stay up longer I'm eventually going to want a steak dinner. Better go to bed now. Long work day ahead....
posted by cchang at 12:10 AM
9 Comments:
damn I love those cookies, too!!!
I love that your mom was scared of the color of the icing - they do tend to be really bright. Especially during spring when they make the bright yellow ones.
or the blue ones...the blue ones are the worst.
dammit! i was going to go to the choral concert (one of my instructors at school was singing) but i forgot! i could have seen you! and listened to music! argh.
sorry you had to follow that with a trip to wal mart. and yes, everything you observed about wal mart is true (plus, the lighting is horrid).
The bit about Wal-Mart was funny and so true. Where do those people come from? I live at like the other end of the continent but I would bet any money the Wal-Mart crowd looks identical in both places. Perhaps Wal-Mart hires people to walk around in trailer-trash garb in some sort of effort to make the products seem more accessible or something, whaddaya think? ;-)
Now that's a good theory! Tis true, I've been to Walmarts in Houston, TX, Ithaca, NY and Willmington, North Carolina and the people all look identical....I wonder how much they pay these imposters and if they get health benefits.
Maybe all Walmarts look the same inside because they are actually all the same place! Perhaps Walmarts are dimensional portals of some kind.
Hey let's test this theory! We'll go to Walmart at the same time and see if we meet each other.
Hmm... if this is true then how come when I enter the Walmart in Manhattan, the store dutifully returns me back to Manhattan when I leave. If I stay in Walmart long enough, will I be able to make Walmart forget which town I come from? If that happens, will Walmart return me to a random town? Or will I trapped in a Walmart Hell forever and ever? Shudder... I'm scared to go to Walmart now!
Actually if Walmarts are dimensional portals (to Hell), there would be no reason why we should see each other inside if we both went to two separate Walmarts at the same time. Each portal might take us to the same place, but a different times - perhaps millions of years apart.
That would explain it. I was in Wal-Mart the other day and saw a mom and daughter who I thought looked much like what Cindy and her mom would have looked like 25 years ago.
Maybe it was them!
That would also explain how sometimes you come across odd items on the shelves: brands of canned chili labeled all in Spanish or discontinued items not manufactured for decades. Those are blips in the tightly organized time-space phase system that ensures shoppers (normally) only see items appropriate to their time and place.
And the Greeters are some sort of race of immortal elders who ensure you are sorted into your proper phase.
Whoa, this is starting to freak me out!
You could do a whole TV series about this. It would be like the North American version of Dr. Who, only cheesier (if that's possible).
I love my friends.
Okay, then what is Target then? Is that the Walmart that exists in the so called 'parallel universe' where all the items are sort of the same, but not really, because they're better? It's a different crowd--slightly younger, nicer smelling, flip flop clad college age people yet learned learning...and yet, every Target has this same crowd.
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